Thursday, August 26, 2010

Apologies . . . and then the 'Bus Post'

Dear lovely readers who probably don't exist:

I apologize for having not written in quite literally almost 8 months. Life, as you know, is always insane for me and I have been juggling alot lately. However, I would like to get back on board as the rainy fall season is approaching and I will inevitably be spending more time cuddled up on the couch with coffee, computer, and t.v. remote in hand than I will be playing outside as I have been the last couple months. An incident occurred the other day which deserves to be told, especially in conjunction with other stories I have neglected to relate to you.

Many of you are probably not aware that until the age of 18 I had never taken public transportation . . . EVER. As a result, it terrified me and I found it gross, smelly, and weird. This is obviously due to the fact that I grew up in a mountainous suburb of Los Angeles, CA and was always driven to school. And then I drove myself when I received 'Jade' for my 16th birthday (a beautiful brand-spankin' new silver-grey colored Jetta which Daddy Biggs got big props for in purchasing for me). ANYWAY. My Ama (grandma to you laypeople) will consistently tell people the story of when she took me to New York for my graduation present at the age of 18, and when we had to use the subway, I made an awful face of disgust (most of you know I am quite good at making those) when I was forced to touch the poles onto which people hold as to not fall over on the fast-moving underground train. Long story short, in my transition to the beautiful Northwest, I have inevitably gotten on the 'green train' and have been using public transportation for almost 2 1/2 years (cue applause please). HOWEVER, there are particular things about the bus that just always make me cringe:

1. screaming babies: there was one on my bus the other day and i wanted to jump through the window- no joke. the only thing i can say about babies is . . . they are loud. don't bring them. (they also take up entirely too much space. is it necessary to give your child 2 seats worth of space in which to roam while the rest of us stand laden with purses, gym bags, and lunch bags? i think not. move the little thing onto your lap.)

2. the lurch-to-a-stop-then-put-pedal-to-the-metal-driver: this type of driver TOTALLY AND COMPLETEY SUCKS! if you are standing- be prepared to brace yourself so you don't fly out the massive glass window that serves as a windshield. These types of drivers have no consideration for the individuals who are standing/flailing all over the place. We know you probably hate your job, but please don't take it out on us by threatening our lives- we hate riding the bus just as much as you hate driving it.

3. the excuse me, excuse me, excuse me passenger: this person ALSO sucks. Almost more than the driver described above. This person is in such fear that the bus driver will not let him/her off at their desired stop, that he/she will begin pushing through the massive crowd that is standing in the middle of the bus, while it is en route, so that they are assured to get off. NOTE TO IDIOT PASSENGER: we that are standing have nowhere to move in order to let you through! I am quite positive that the bus driver neglects to pull away from the curb until all passengers get off. I have actually turned around to a person who has said 'excuse me' to me in this situation and said, "I have nowhere else to go. You will need to wait to get through until we have pulled up to the stop and other passengers have gotten off." Let me tell you- THAT shuts people up.

I am sorry if I come across as impatient or rude, however when you are on a large vehicle with so many other people EARLY in the morning, no one wants to deal with any of the situations described above.

Happy Travels!

xo,
E