Wednesday, September 1, 2010

I Know We're Pretty, but Don't Hit on Us. Please.

Last week, two of my best girlfriends and I went to our usual happy hour at one of our not-so-usual spots . . . which is totally fine because the place we went is not only phenomenal, but they had $3 glasses of wine (and who doesn't love that?!)

Anyway, after much fawning over one another and stuffing our faces with too many appetizers (during which time my mouth caught on FIRE due to crazy-hot hot sauce that was poured all over the lobster and crab nachos), we ran into a long-lost male friend of ours who we had not seen in quite sometime. It was wonderful to catch up with him and we urged him to have a party at his house so that "we can come and bring food and stuff." (yeah right- the only food I'm bringing is the limes for Tanqueray and Tonics). Anyway, our friend went back to his table and the girls continued to talk too loud and laugh too hard.

All of a sudden, like magic- 3 new glasses of wine appeared before our very eyes! The waitress said- "the gentleman over there wanted me to deliver these to you." And we smiled and tried to find our male friend who had OBVIOUSLY been the one to send the drinks over. However, immediately once the waitress left, a middle-aged man-boy (he might have been late 20's but if he was, he didn't do much to make himself look so, he had a pudge and what looked to be a mini comb-over going on)   approached us from behind and said, "So, how are you girls enjoying the drinks I got you?" My friend replies, "Actually, we know you didn't purchase these for us- because our friend over there did." Then man-boy says, "Well shouldn't I get props for at least coming over?" In my head I am thinking: Um no, you should NOT receive props for coming over as you most definitely just interrupted what was supposed to be an All-Girls-Happy-Hour, during which time none of us would like to be hit on because we all have serious boyfriends who don't have pudges or come-overs. Don't worry- I didn't say such a thing to him, however the worst part was that he continued to stand there- staring at us (sometimes not saying a single word), while awkwardly listening to our conversation. He was one of those people that forces himself into social situations where he is not wanted, and although it is painfully awkward to begin with- said individual continues to make it WORSE by not being witty or talkative and therefore creates a weird situation for all. We should not be forced to make up for your inept social skills while YOU were the one to make the indecent choice to come over and unsuccessfully hit on us while claiming purchase of another man's drinks. It is rude, inappropriate, and unwanted to impose yourself on three ladies who are just looking to have a good time with their girlfriends. What is worse is that apparently the guy was with a few co-workers who assured our waitress that, "Don't worry- Jim is great with girls." Ummmm . . . on what planet?!

NEWS FLASH WEIRDO: I know we're pretty, but don't hit on us. Please.

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